Freeman Legacy 2.1
As my life with my husband started, I couldn't have been happier. It seemed like all the sadness that had filled my life since I was a teenager was over. From now on, things would be perfect.
And the first part of that was some news I told Matt over breakfast one morning.
"I'm pregnant," I told him, my arms moving to indicate my stomach, as if he was going to think I was carrying a child in my shoulder.
"Harrie, what?" Matt gasped. He coughed out a chunk of food, and looked at me sharply.
"Pregnant," I repeated, suddenly unsure. "Me. With a baby."
"Oh god, Harrie, that's great!" He stood and wrapped me in his arms, lifting me into the air as we spun before he set me down gently. "You're sure?"
"Yes," I laughed, a little dizzy. "At least, that what the little plastic stick said. I have a doctor's appointment in a couple days to confirm."
Matt was wonderful all throughout my pregnancy. He had a job at a gym, and I'd gotten a job in local government, so we couldn't always be together, but we made time. Some evenings, we'd sit on a bench on the deck out back and watch the fireflies and the stars start to appear in the darkening sky. Matt got into a habit of talking to the baby as we did that.
"I can't wait to show you a firefly, kid," he said one night. His hand was on my belly and he rubbed as he talked. "And the stars and the trees and the river."
"It's amazing, isn't it?" I asked. "I mean, there's a baby in my belly and one day, it will be out here and we'll be the only ones around to show it stuff like that. And to teach it not to touch the stove and what good music is and all the things that babies need to know."
Matt looked into my eyes and his hand moved to my leg. "We'll do it, you know. You and me, we'll teach it everything."
"Aren't you worried?" I asked. "About being a bad parent, about getting it wrong? It's not like you can just hit 'restart' on your kid's life and try again." I was starting to babble. Those worries had been getting to me, and it was all coming out. Matt rubbed my leg with the hand already there and cupped my cheek with the other.
"Yeah," he whispered. "Sometimes I do worry, but we won't be alone. You know your sister will help us out, and you'll have to get a crowbar to separate Gina from her niece or nephew once she gets hold of them. And we can always ask my parents if we need help." He leaned in and kissed me softly. "This kid is gonna be just fine."
He was like that all throughout my pregnancy, giving my belly little rubs in the mornings before I went to work, and giving me massages when I came home feeling sore. As the months passed, I felt those worries ebb away. We'd do this together.
Sometimes, I found myself looking at the portraits of my parents. They still hung in our house, on the living room wall. They were both great parents. I wondered if they felt nervous when Mama found out she was pregnant with Helena. I've read most of Mama's books, but there isn't really a difference between before she was pregnant and after. Maybe it's because they were older. Matt and I were young, only recently married and just starting our careers.
Mama and Papa had been great parents. I'm sure they would have been wonderful grandparents too. It was a lot to live up to.
Equally as wonderful was my sister. Helena was thrilled about her niece or nephew and a cousin for Britney. She said that after Britney was born, she and Houda had talked about having another child, but had decided that one was enough for them. After she told me that, Helena gave me a mischievous grin that I recognized from our childhood. "You know we're gonna be over all the time once this little one is born, right?" she asked. "You'll never get rid of us."
I just laughed and pulled her into a hug. "I love you, Helena."
Since I was there, I spent some time with my niece, Britney. She seemed to grow like a sprout and delighted in telling me all about her day and her toys and that time her moms took her to the park. Between her babbling and a few nonsense words, it was hard to understand, but I enjoyed just listening anyway.
Before I left, I read one of her books to get her calmer and settled for a nap. Helena said that Britney had heard that book read to her a thousand times, but she watched me intently and corrected me if ever I missed a word. I felt the baby inside me squirm and enjoyed the thought that it wouldn't be too long before I could read to it like I read to Britney now.
As my pregnancy progressed, I found myself getting more and more tired. I would take naps after work or on weekends. Some lasted so long that Matt would wake me just to help me into bed. I had never felt so tired in my life. Sometimes I wished that the baby would just hurry up and get here.
I wanted to take that wish back when I went into labour. I had been at home, going to the study to settle into an armchair with a book, when I felt the first contractions. I called out to Matt, who was in the gym, not to far away, and he rushed me to the hospital. I staggered in through the front doors as he parked the car.
"Just a moment," the receptionist said, doing something on her computer.
"Can you please get a doctor here?" I asked, trying not to panic.
"Just a moment, miss," she repeated.
I closed my eyes and counted to ten. This was fine. She probably saw pregnant mothers come in every day. She would know if there was something to panic about, right?
The receptionist seemed to finish what she was doing and looked up at me for the first time. "Do you have an appointment?"
"Sort of hard to plan these things," I joked as another contraction hit. I had to grind the next part out through clamped teeth. "I'm having a baby."
She sighed and pointed to her left. "Maternity ward, to your right. Go through the door into the hall, last door." With that, she went back to whatever was on the screen.
Eventually, I got to the delivery room in the maternity ward. A doctor, much nicer than the lady at the front desk, brought me to a machine that seemed less like it was designed for delivering a baby and more like a convoluted contraption a super-villain would design in a Bond movie.
"It's okay," the doctor said. "I know it seems scary, but it's the safest way to have a baby these days." She pressed some buttons on a control panel, and the machine moved into place around me. I couldn't move my body below the chest, and I asked if that was normal.
"You've received a mild sedative and pain-killer," the doctor told me. "And the machine keeps you secure so you don't move during the procedure.
Now that she mentioned it, I wasn't feeling as much pain as before.
Matt burst into the room. I heard the sound of the door slamming open distantly, as though down a long corridor. My husband seemed to panic at seeing me in this strange machine, and started asking the doctor a dozen questions. I was finding it hard to pay attention, though.
After that, I think I passed out.
When I came to, the machine had retreated away from me, and a baby was in a hospital bassinet beside me. Matt was sitting in a chair by the wall, but rushed over when he saw me move. He helped me stand and change into something that wasn't a hospital gown.
I gently lifted my baby from the cot. The movement woke him and he looked up at me. He didn't cry, though, and while I knew that he couldn't really see me, it warmed my heart to see him stare up at my face.
Matt stood to the side, watching me with our child. He smiled. "You look good, Harrie."
"I look like a mess," I corrected him.
He ignored my comment and changed the subject. "The name we decided on?" he asked. We'd discussed names extensively, and we had narrowed it down to a tentative two. One for a boy, one for a girl.
"Yeah," I said, not putting down our son. "Jasper."
Jasper settled into our lives as we started a routine that included him. We learned to live with a little less sleep, though Jasper wasn't a very fussy baby.
Matt loved spending time with his little Jazz Man, as he called him. He could spend hours just holding him and sometimes I would come home to find them on the couch downstairs, Jasper sleeping on his father's chest, and a small smile on Matt's face as he watched.
I loved being a mother, but I couldn't put my life on hold for Jasper. I was finally up for election as a small public official, and campaigning meant a lot of time away from home. I tried to take Jasper along with me, but a young infant is not the best to have around when making promises about one's commitment to the public well-being.
I tried to make up for it by being there for the big things. I was there on his birthday to help him take his first steps, to see his green eyes, exactly like Papa's, blink up at me with a big smile. That was when I felt that no matter what I did throughout the rest of my life, no matter what I achieved in my career, nothing would be worth more than that moment.
Jasper was our little ray of light. Since the moment he was born, both Matt and I felt like this immeasurably wonderful presence had been added to our lives. And that only grew as he did. We found happiness in everything he did, in just being with him.
I loved my darling boy dearly, and I never wanted him to doubt that. When he was sad or cranky, I would give him a hug and feel his little body melt against mine. As he started talking, he'd call them "Mama hugs", and would come up to me as soon as I got home, begging for a Mama hug.
But I wasn't always around to give Mama hugs. Matt had less time at work than I did, and in some ways I resented him for getting to spend so much time with Jasper. In the mornings, when Jasper woke up, I was usually at work already, but on the days that I wasn't, I'd watch Matt wake our son. He'd coax his Jazz Man out of bed and help him into that day's clothes. Often, Jasper would ask to go up and Matt would swing our little boy up and over his head, eliciting a screech of laughter.
I loved those mornings. Seeing my boys together melted my heart every time.
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Hey, so I'm not dead. Nor is this legacy, despite appearances to the contrary (*cough* away for six months *cough, couch*). Harrie and Matt's story will be continuing and their children's and their children's children's. Even if it might take a while.
Thank you so much to everyone who has read this far, who returned to this story or found it for the first time. I promise that the next chapter won't take six months, and hope you enjoyed this one and will enjoy all the chapters in the future. See you next time!
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